growth on the narrow pt.2

ma⋅tu⋅ri⋅ty 
 /məˈtʃʊərɪti, -ˈtʊər-, -ˈtyʊər-, -ˈtʃɜr-/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [muh-choor-i-tee, -toor-, -tyoor-, -chur-] Show IPA Pronunciation
–noun
1.
the state of being mature; ripeness: The fruit will reach maturity in a few days.
2.
full development; perfected condition: maturity of judgment; to bring a plan to maturity.



how long will i be like this? like a child? when does one mature in spritual matters?

WHEN????

one of my biggest fears is that i will stay like this forever and miss the promises of God.

how does one miss the promises of God? not maturing...that is how.

how many times must one go through the same lesson? hah! until one gets it right!!!

how many times can one person make the same mistakes?

wisdom is given. counsel is given. the heart must be pliable. and eager. is my heart eager?

the character...lets not get on the character...

the birth in the spirit is coming up...and i just dont know...will i be ready? will i be birthed? or will i die here?

O lord hear my heart in this prayer,

i need a heart transplant.

in jesus name, amen.